Divide and conquer. It worked for Caesar, let's use it to stop canned lion hunting.

Are you looking for a topic to debate endlessly and without any chance of changing the other person's point of view? Try hunting or, better yet, canned lion hunting. Few topics outside, or even including, religion and politics are as polarised as this one. There is hardly any middle-ground to tread on between the barbed-wired trenches on either side of the battlefield. And to continue the metaphor, the heavier the shelling, the firmer the entrenchment. Worse, while dug in deep in their trenches the 'hunters' are building camaraderie amongst themselves, strengthening their resolve not to give in one single inch, and building up ever increasing hatred for those on the opposite side of the battlefield, the ones they hold responsible for their predicament.

And therein lies the major flaw of the strategy of those that have been trying to put an end to canned lion hunting through shouting, demonising and legislation. All they are achieving is a closing of the ranks between those involved in this sordid industry (as that is what it is). They're providing them with the ammunition they need to set themselves apart from and above the 'tree lovers' and 'bunny huggers' and are allowing them to have fun ridiculing them over a pot of beer or, if in South Africa, possibly klippies and coke.

So how to get out of this impasse? What else can be done?

I say, "Change tack completely." Divide and conquer!

Stop attacking the hunters and portraying them as monsters. That will only boost their already big enough egos. Expose 'canned hunting' for what it is: Not really any more difficult than price shooting at the fair and hardly any more dangerous. And with the same prize for a good shot in both cases: A cute, stuffed, little lion!

As, unless a canned hunter gets into business with a really shitty operator it really is no more hazardous to the 'hunter's' health than crossing the street after properly looking left and right (or right and left, I always get these mixed up).

So, let's rather start a campaign to make public the trickery, the smoke and mirrors, used by operators to stroke the hunter's egos. Reveal how they create the illusion of having shot a wild lion with great skill and grave risk to the hunters own life and limbs. In doing so, let's make it impossible for them to boast at home that they've 'just returned from shooting a lion' in (South) Africa. Let's go out and collect the many examples, quotes from operators, etc that show how 'the great white hunter' did not even realise he (or she) shot a drugged, or even a frozen (imagine that, how stupid can you be?) lion. And let's make sure this becomes widely known and accepted. Get David Letterman, Jay Leno, Conan O'Brien to joke about them, cartoons to ridicule them, make them the poster boys for male insecurity, compensating for certain small body parts!

Enough of this, and soon enough the next time a hunter proudly boasts of having shot a lion in Africa, his friends will smirk in their beers and ask him whether it was "A frozen of a drugged one?" and give him a hard time about it. This will hurt his (or her) ego a million times harder than any "evil monster" allegation from the other trench.

Take away the glory by exposing the true nature of canned hunting, reveal how it is staged, controlled, directed; a production to make Hollywood jealous. Create criticism and ridicule from within their own ranks, during their beer or klippies and coke sessions, so eventually none of those 'real men' will dare admit he shot a lion in (South) Africa for fear of being laughed out of the bar by his own buddies.

Divide and conquer, deflate their egos, make them turn on their own, that's the way to go!

Pretty soon they'll start ditching their bullets and looking around for a white rag to attach to the front of their rifle. A white flag to wave about as they are forced out of the trenches and into the open by their own former comrades in arms.

So, let's go for it! Let's smoke them out one by one!

Veni, vidi, vici!

New blog, first rant...

I've created this blog quite some time ago already, intending to regularly write about whatever interests me; things I notice in the news, things that happen in my life, or things that lend themselves to a nice rant. (Doesn't it feel great to once in a while rant about something and then wonder later what you got all worked up about? Be honest, you've done it too... and if you really haven't you should definitely try it!)

Some future blogs will definitely include Danie Krugel (major rant alert!!!), Jacob and Helen and Julius, the Dutch Cricket team (go Tulips!), paper wasps, crèches and churches, and, and, and.

But back to this first blog, today I found another one of 'those' messages in my inbox. It came from someone I once met on a course and had exchanged email addresses with. Somehow, despite me asking him to desist several times, he keeps including me in these so obviously bogus chain mails and this does annoy me big time. (Anybody feel a rant coming on yet...?)

While some of these need some thought (not a lot, though) to be seen through, many, like the one I got today, are so OBVIOUSLY fake that for the life of me I can not think why people would fall for them and then send them on to the requested 8, 10, 20, or more people on their contact list. Look at this picture that summarises the 'offer':



Ha!, send an email to 8 people and a free laptop is yours, send it to 20 and an even better one will come your way. Never mind that to the T18 and R320 aren't even lap tops, but cell phones, and that the T18 was released almost 10 years ago (almost long enough ago to have fossilised by now), all this giving away is supposedly done to increase sales! Now that's an interesting strategy if I ever saw one!

Picture the board meeting where the junior sales rep pitches this brilliant, revolutionary concept, dazzling the room with tons of colourful Powerpoint slides:

"Let's give a free lap top (cell phone) to everyone that forwards our promotional email to 8 or 20 friends. I'm certain those friends will then not simply send it to 8 or 20 more people to get one for free as well, but they will go out and buy one (or maybe even two)! Sales will go through the roof!" The sales rep out the window more likely!

Do the people that send these messages on, clogging up mail boxes, wasting bandwidth, and generally polluting the 'net (exaggerations are allowed in rants, they're part of the fun!), really believe this is legit, that they will receive a lap top for free? Or do they have doubts, but are just to afraid to miss out in case it is true?

I was very tempted to create an email address, respond from there that they have been selected to receive one and then ask them to send me personal details, like bank account numbers, etc. I'm sure at least some would fall for it hook, line and sinker, with vistas of free lap tops (with Vista?) dancing before their eyes. I decided not too, maybe next time... but for now:

Please people, think before you send, even one halfway critical glance will reveal that it just can not be for real. "If it sounds to good to be true, that's because it is!"


Aaaahhh, that feels better...